Randy Me #9

My first couple of days were quiet. I practically slept through till Monday, then I went to work and introduced mysef. I have to say here, been a Lagos bobo and used to the hustle, I woke up at 5 a.m, prepared for work and started pacing my hotel room when I realised cars weren’t moving on the streets – another lesson every Lagosian knows, don’t be the first one on the road early in the morning cause as they say on the street, igboro o rerin. I didn’t leave the hotel room until 6.30a.m, downstairs, I asked the concierge for directions to my new office, which he gave me subserviently. After driving for almost forty minutes, I found the place. The security men and I exchanged a few words, then I was admitted into the complex. Unfortunately, I had to wait at the reception, damn! I had been waiting a full two hours before the man I was supposed to report to came in, I mentally scored mr Eugene points for promptness. This dude would be a tardy boss, I surmised. Handshakes and a tour later, I was shown my office, yes office. Not a workstation as Lagos would have provided, an office, phew! I threw myself into work earnestly. Sonia and Trisha had called severally, they both got the same line. I had been transfered out of town indefinitely, for Sonia, Witch – sorry Jane – would liaise with her about her portfolios with the company. I put both ladies behind me. The company finally got me an apartment three weeks after I got to Akure. I was enjoying the stark contrast to Lagos. The city was dreamy and peaceful, unlike the rush that had become Lagos’ stamp – ‘Gidi. Two months went by without incident, I was no longer drinking, and I had managed to stay off women since stepping into Akure. Believe me when I say this, Akure babes set die! Yet I hadn’t even considered striking a conversation in order to satisfy ‘some’ needs. That was when I let my guard down. I ate at a certain restaurant every Saturday due to the fact that I loved the soup. That fateful Saturday, I had finished eating but was too stuffed to stand, so I sat still and started seeing the musical videos playing on tv. By the time the third video played, I was already bored and wanted out of the place. I hissed unconsciously and said, ‘crap,’ aloud. ‘You are not alone.’ A strange but melodious voice answered me. I turned round and noticed a gorgeous looking lady smiling at me. I am not exaggerating, but she was prettier than Halle Berry, Beyonce or even miss World. My eyes literally popped out of their sockets and I knew I was in trouble. I had to get out of the restaurant fast. ‘Ah, this is a better video,’ she nodded at the tv still smiling. Argh! Shut up! I screamed, mentally. She was getting to me and I could see myself relapsing. Oh God, two whole months and I was about to start again. I managed a smile. ‘Yea, the song’s quite cool.’ She pursed her lips, her brow raised; I could see she clearly loved the song, whereas I considered it average. She was battling with herself on whether or not to unleash a scathing remark. I stood up and walked to her table, my hand stretched, I introduced myself. ‘My name is Akin, it was a pleasure to have met you.’ She took my hand warily, eyeing me with suspicion. ‘I’m Oluwakemi.’ I waited for more, but when it became apparent that we had subconsciously entered into a browbeating game, I dismissed her and started walking away. ‘I’ll see you around,’ those were my last words on our first meeting, if only I knew…, maybe I would have kept mute. But like I said earlier, I was the butt of a cosmic joke. I didn’t have a choice than play along in the sadistic game of the gods…